je suis aimé
Something's bugging me.
Well, I am going for an interview with an investment bank this Friday. The recruiter called me today and said the bank is eager to meet up with me either tomorrow or Friday. I chose the latter cause I figured I needed some time to recover from my headache (feels more like a migrane now) and I wanted to sort out my portfolio, i.e my certificates etc.
I guess I should be feeling happy, but I can't quite put a finger to why I am not exactly feeling that way. Instead the feeling of apprehension looms over me.
Am I being silly wanting to give up my current job, with the attractive night shift allowance? Sure the money is good, but look at my health? I am like a walking zombie these days? I am constantly lerthagic and lackadaisical. But what if the next job sucks? And to leave now means foregoing my variable bonus which I will receive in Feb next year.. At least its July now. You aren't really losing out much. Money isn't everything you know.
*Ah.... banishes those thoughts away*
Right, I'll get through Friday's interview first before I worry about the next step. One baby step at a time, I must remind myself.
**
I just finished reading "Five People You Meet in Heaven" By Mitch Albom. Very gripping.
I had people telling me they wept over the books by Mitch Albom, namely the above and Tuesdays with Morrie. I read them both and I didn't shed a tear? Well, I am touched by the books but they don't tug my heartstring hard enough for those tears to start rolling down. In some juncture, I felt a little desensitised and even oblivious.
Have I become hardened or what?
If you have read those two books, share with me your experiences.
**
I have a little habit.
At the end of each day, I will think back on the day's happenings and I will capture a snapshot which I will preserve away. It could be an image, an emotion I felt or an object which caught my attention.
Today's snapshot? During dinner time.
I was totally famished and I literally gobbled my food down. He was sitting next to me, on my right quietly eating his noodles. Then just as I finished the last piece of charsiew on my plate, he took a side glance at me and smiled sheepishly.
Oh dear, did I look horrendously unglam eating so quickly? I wondered.
I love you very much, dear.
He said as he smoothed my fly-away hair off my right cheek and looked at me so lovingly and tenderly.
I love you too.
I could have just melted there and then.
Well, I am going for an interview with an investment bank this Friday. The recruiter called me today and said the bank is eager to meet up with me either tomorrow or Friday. I chose the latter cause I figured I needed some time to recover from my headache (feels more like a migrane now) and I wanted to sort out my portfolio, i.e my certificates etc.
I guess I should be feeling happy, but I can't quite put a finger to why I am not exactly feeling that way. Instead the feeling of apprehension looms over me.
Am I being silly wanting to give up my current job, with the attractive night shift allowance? Sure the money is good, but look at my health? I am like a walking zombie these days? I am constantly lerthagic and lackadaisical. But what if the next job sucks? And to leave now means foregoing my variable bonus which I will receive in Feb next year.. At least its July now. You aren't really losing out much. Money isn't everything you know.
*Ah.... banishes those thoughts away*
Right, I'll get through Friday's interview first before I worry about the next step. One baby step at a time, I must remind myself.
**
I just finished reading "Five People You Meet in Heaven" By Mitch Albom. Very gripping.
I had people telling me they wept over the books by Mitch Albom, namely the above and Tuesdays with Morrie. I read them both and I didn't shed a tear? Well, I am touched by the books but they don't tug my heartstring hard enough for those tears to start rolling down. In some juncture, I felt a little desensitised and even oblivious.
Have I become hardened or what?
If you have read those two books, share with me your experiences.
**
I have a little habit.
At the end of each day, I will think back on the day's happenings and I will capture a snapshot which I will preserve away. It could be an image, an emotion I felt or an object which caught my attention.
Today's snapshot? During dinner time.
I was totally famished and I literally gobbled my food down. He was sitting next to me, on my right quietly eating his noodles. Then just as I finished the last piece of charsiew on my plate, he took a side glance at me and smiled sheepishly.
Oh dear, did I look horrendously unglam eating so quickly? I wondered.
I love you very much, dear.
He said as he smoothed my fly-away hair off my right cheek and looked at me so lovingly and tenderly.
I love you too.
I could have just melted there and then.
posted by Shazza at Wednesday, July 13, 2005
3 Comments:
1. You are just going for an interview to see your career options outside ML. Even if they do offer a job to you, you can always decline. So your focus should be to see if the job they are offering you suits your own career path. You are choosing them as much as they are choosing you.
2. I think you need a break .. think 7-10 days sort. And if you really want to know, summer sale in HK .. ;o) Or just go back to aussieland. And chill-and-relax treatment seem to be in order.
3. Pick up those books again next time when you feel like it. I am probably nuts for saying this .. but you are not ready yet to receive those messages. Maybe something looms bigger now than trying define the meaning of life.
1- That's true. I should go with the mindset that I am exploring my options, either within or outside.
2- Yah man!!!!!!!! I'm feeling super burned out
3- Probably, maybe I am not at the "I need to define the meaning of life" stage, at the moment.
Hello Ren the Pen,
yeah I read that yesterday when I visited you LJ.
I like how this sounds ;)
"When it comes to finding work and earning money, Pisces will be one of the most favored signs of 2005, and you will see the truth of this quite vividly in October"
Hello Pam the Ham,
We are planning a holiday in August, after his exams. Most likely Sydney and HK (if we fly back Cathay) ;)
Love you both!
Shaz the Pez (i suppose its abbreviation for Pest)
P/s: Can't find anything to rythme with Ren, hence the Pen.. hehe
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